# How Insecurity Can Ruin a Relationship

One of the fastest ways to drain the love out of a relationship is to be extremely insecure. In order to love and be loved, you need to love yourself and be confident in who you are.

Do you think that you deserve to be loved? This is an important element in a healthy and long-lasting relationship. Many people struggle with feelings of self-doubt and insecurity, but these negative emotions plague some people more than others. Here is how insecurity can harm a potentially great relationship.

Insecurity can make you overly jealous: The slightest hint of a connection between your significant other and someone else could drive you to outright accusations against them. It is not fair to expect him or her to cease all communications with everyone else, and you should not be comparing yourself to every person that they come in contact with. They are with you for a reason, and you should feel good about that.

It can make it difficult to open up to your partner: Some people feel that if they revealed whom they truly are inside, they would be rejected. There is always a risk of this happening, but anyone who doesn't love you for who you truly are, should be with you anyway. Emotional intimacy is important in healthy relationships, and you are only driving the other person away by not letting them really get to know you.

Trusting your significant other is difficult when you are insecure: Thoughts of your partner cheating on you or leaving you can plague your mind and practically torture you. It can get to the point where you think they are lying to you when they are not, and you can make fault assumptions about their character based on suspicion that is completely unjustified. This can hurt your partner, or even make them angry. It is frustrating to try to be loving and faithful to someone who doesn't believe that you are sincere.

Talking negatively about yourself can take away from your attractiveness: Insecure people sometimes put themselves down in front of others. This is a defense tactic that they use to protect themselves against other people putting them down. It can simply be unattractive, and it is easy to lose interest in someone who doesn't believe that they are interesting, good, appealing, and pleasantly unique.

Insecurity can make it difficult for you to accept love from others: It is really hurtful when someone you care about, doesn't accept your love. If you reject someone because you think that you aren't good enough for them, it hurts just the same as any other reason. They think that you are special and that you deserve the affection and attention. Take their word for it, and embrace their acts of love.

Overcoming self-doubts can be really difficult, but you don't have to do it alone. You can talk it out and learn how to love yourself. Once you understand what it means to love yourself, you can love others amazingly. That is a huge factor in having good relationships of any kind. Take the steps to let go of your insecurities, and embrace what love has to offer you.

By Chesley Maldonado