Showing posts with label Relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Relationships. Show all posts
#12 Relationship Truths I Wish I Knew #12 Years Ago
Twelve years ago I was eighteen and just entering college. Since then, friends and acquaintances have come and gone, girlfriends have come and gone, and I met the love of my life, Angel. I’ve found through my years – through my experience with my own personal relationships – that there are certain undeniable truths that affect the quality and longevity of our relationships, and the resulting impact they have on us. I share them with you today in hopes that they save you from a little heartache and confusion.
# Today Relationship Quotes
"Don’t wait for the right person to come into your life.
Rather, be the right person to come to someone’s life."
~Unknown
# How Insecurity Can Ruin a Relationship
One of the fastest ways to drain the love out of a relationship is to be extremely insecure. In order to love and be loved, you need to love yourself and be confident in who you are.
Do you think that you deserve to be loved? This is an important element in a healthy and long-lasting relationship. Many people struggle with feelings of self-doubt and insecurity, but these negative emotions plague some people more than others. Here is how insecurity can harm a potentially great relationship.
Do you think that you deserve to be loved? This is an important element in a healthy and long-lasting relationship. Many people struggle with feelings of self-doubt and insecurity, but these negative emotions plague some people more than others. Here is how insecurity can harm a potentially great relationship.
# Today Relationship Quotes
"Trust is the glue of life.
It's the most essential ingredient in effective communication.
It's the foundational principle that holds all relationships."
~Stephen R. Covey
# Little Words with Absolutely Huge Meaning - Use Them
As children many of us hyped the statement, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Clearly, it doesn’t take long to realize that words have far more weight than we want to realize. They influence thoughts, feelings, actions and states of mind. Even little words often have big meaning.
Think about it. Whether you want to land your dream job, improve your friendships, save your marriage or retain your employees; the words you choose can make all the difference. The simplest little words, which we take for granted, have the power to hurt or heal, to inspire or discourage, to help or to hinder.
The list below includes 18 examples of little words that have big meaning in the most positive way.
# How to Build a Healthy Love Life
Human beings crave intimacy, need to love and be loved. Yet people have much trouble doing so.
It's clear from the many letters I get that lots of folks have no idea what a healthy relationship even looks like. Because I care about these things, and care about the environments children grow in, I'm using this space as an attempt to remedy the problem—again.
From many sources and many experts, I have culled some basic rules of relationships. This is by no means an exhaustive list. But it's a start. Print them out and pin them up on your refrigerator door. I won't test you on them—but life will.
It's clear from the many letters I get that lots of folks have no idea what a healthy relationship even looks like. Because I care about these things, and care about the environments children grow in, I'm using this space as an attempt to remedy the problem—again.
From many sources and many experts, I have culled some basic rules of relationships. This is by no means an exhaustive list. But it's a start. Print them out and pin them up on your refrigerator door. I won't test you on them—but life will.
# Metaphor for Love
Love is like playing the piano.
First you must learn to play by the rules,
then you must forget the rules and play from your heart..
# How Will I Know I Am Really In Love?
Seven key indicators to know when you are in love.
In our many interviews with people “in love” we ask them the most revealing question of the interview – “When did you know you were in love?” We have heard very consistent answers over our 28+ years of interviews with couples in love. There are seven key indicators to know when you are really in love:
# Forgiveness in Relationships
By: Gwen Randall-Young
“When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” ~ Catherine Ponder
Lack of forgiveness is one of the things that can keep a relationship from moving forward. If a partner has done something that hurt us, we have some decisions to make.
First, we have to decide if the incident was a deal-breaker. Things like unfaithfulness, lying, physical abuse or addictions may be things we simply cannot live with. If that is the case we must do what we have to do to move one.
If the incident was hurtful, but we still want to keep the relationship, there are two things that can happen. The partner may express sincere regret for the hurt and express the intention to avoid similar recurrences. However, it may be that the individual refuses to apologize or acknowledge your feelings.
In the latter case it is very difficult to move forward as the issue feels unfinished or unresolved. It remains near the surface and the hurt may be triggered again and again. Often there is resentment as well. It is important for couples to try to come to some sort of peace around these issues, because if they do not there is a tendency for additional issues to occur and pile up. If you both seem stuck and there is no resolution, consider professional help.
In the case of a sincere apology, it is important to accept the apology and move forward. This means that the issue is not brought up again every time there is a conflict. If the same thing keeps happening, that is a different matter. Then it does need to be discussed, along with the sincerity of previous apologies.
In the case of a one-time incident that maybe happened long ago, the sincere apology should put an end to it. It is not fair to keep bringing up the past when it cannot be changed and the person is sincerely sorry. There is wisdom in forgiving and forgetting. Forgiving does not mean that what happened was okay. It just means we choose to let it go so we can build on the positive in the relationship.
“When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.” ~ Catherine Ponder
Lack of forgiveness is one of the things that can keep a relationship from moving forward. If a partner has done something that hurt us, we have some decisions to make.
First, we have to decide if the incident was a deal-breaker. Things like unfaithfulness, lying, physical abuse or addictions may be things we simply cannot live with. If that is the case we must do what we have to do to move one.
If the incident was hurtful, but we still want to keep the relationship, there are two things that can happen. The partner may express sincere regret for the hurt and express the intention to avoid similar recurrences. However, it may be that the individual refuses to apologize or acknowledge your feelings.
In the latter case it is very difficult to move forward as the issue feels unfinished or unresolved. It remains near the surface and the hurt may be triggered again and again. Often there is resentment as well. It is important for couples to try to come to some sort of peace around these issues, because if they do not there is a tendency for additional issues to occur and pile up. If you both seem stuck and there is no resolution, consider professional help.
In the case of a sincere apology, it is important to accept the apology and move forward. This means that the issue is not brought up again every time there is a conflict. If the same thing keeps happening, that is a different matter. Then it does need to be discussed, along with the sincerity of previous apologies.
In the case of a one-time incident that maybe happened long ago, the sincere apology should put an end to it. It is not fair to keep bringing up the past when it cannot be changed and the person is sincerely sorry. There is wisdom in forgiving and forgetting. Forgiving does not mean that what happened was okay. It just means we choose to let it go so we can build on the positive in the relationship.
Source: www.gwen.ca
# What does Love Mean
"What does love mean?"
A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds. The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:
"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."
Rebecca- age 8
"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."
Billy - age 4
"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."
Karl - age 5
# Are You Listening or Hearing?
Have you been frustrated others by not listening to them? or perhaps you have been frustrated by someone who is not listening to what you are saying?
People used to to think that listening is the same as hearing, but the truth is, listening is hearing + understanding.
Often times during a conversation we jump in to say what is on our minds even before we acknowledge or register what the other person is saying. This ‘butting-in’ short circuits the possibility of a mutual understanding between you and the other speaker, even if you did not deliberately set out to break the flow of conversation.
How do you know when a person is not listening? It is usually easy to sense this. Tell-tale signs are poor eye contact, shuffling feet, busy hands, and meaningless replies like
People used to to think that listening is the same as hearing, but the truth is, listening is hearing + understanding.
Often times during a conversation we jump in to say what is on our minds even before we acknowledge or register what the other person is saying. This ‘butting-in’ short circuits the possibility of a mutual understanding between you and the other speaker, even if you did not deliberately set out to break the flow of conversation.
How do you know when a person is not listening? It is usually easy to sense this. Tell-tale signs are poor eye contact, shuffling feet, busy hands, and meaningless replies like
# How to Make Your Relationship a Happily Ever After Story
Realistically, you can't expect happily ever after to be brought to you via a magic wand. But having the perfect relationship doesn't mean you have to take a leaf out of the drab, dull and boring book.
A happy and long term relationship can be very attainable, lasting well past the over-glorified honeymoon period. All that is needed is the willingness to work at it even when things get tough - because as with any partnership, there's no doubt that at some stage, things will definitely get tough.
A healthy relationship can be likened to a healthy body. We are all very aware that your body requires the essentials of proper feeding, consistent exercise and adequate rest, and these requirements can be applied equally to your relationship. It too needs constant reassurance, sufficient time together and, in my belief the absolute key - communication.
# 2 Very Basic Rules of People Relationships
We see lots of people living inharmony and unhappy just because they can't keep relationships well. They can be high payee professional, government crew and so on. Deeply inside, they always asking, what’s the problem? What’s wrong with us? Why I can live life with a good relationship. What's the matter?
In expert way we've heard something called 'people skill'. So what is that? No need to confuse about the definition. You could google it later. Just try to understand and receive that this skill could help us to keep and build our relationship. There are so many thing to learn on 'people skill', but if your main purpose is to keep and/or build a good relationship you just need to considered two rules of it. Let’s go to the first one.
In expert way we've heard something called 'people skill'. So what is that? No need to confuse about the definition. You could google it later. Just try to understand and receive that this skill could help us to keep and build our relationship. There are so many thing to learn on 'people skill', but if your main purpose is to keep and/or build a good relationship you just need to considered two rules of it. Let’s go to the first one.
# I Believe
I believe-
That we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
I believe-
That no matter how good a friend is,
They're going to hurt you every once in a while and, you must forgive them for that.
I believe-
That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.
# Love story
Hungry for Your Love
by Herman and Roma Rosenblat
As told to Barbara DeAngelis, Ph.D.
It is cold, so bitter cold, on this dark, winter day in 1942. But it is no different from any other day in this Nazi concentration camp. I stand shivering in my thin rags, still in disbelief that this nightmare is happening. I am just a young boy. I should be playing with friends; I should be going to school; I should be looking forward to a future, to growing up and marrying, and having a family of my own. But those dreams are for the living, and I am no longer one of them. Instead, I am almost dead, surviving from day to day, from hour to hour, ever since I was taken from my home and brought here with tens of thousands other Jews. Will I still be alive tomorrow? Will I be taken to the gas chamber tonight?
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